sebelum waktu

aku mengetuk ngetuk di pintu yang tertutup itu.
Perlahan.  Dalam, khidmat dan diam.
izinkan aku masuk dan tenggelam...
kemudian tampaklah pualam
yang indah dan sempurna
indah, sempurna tapi percuma
hanya kesia-siaan yang pahit

kita hanyalah engsel dan pintu yang tak lagi pas
karena rotasimu yang telah bergeser meski sedikit
dan aku hanya mulai lelah dan berderik

kita mungkin satu, tapi sudah tak lagi sama
tahukah kamu? tidak ada yang indah dari kepura-puraan
tidak ada yang baik dari kemunafikan

kita berpisah bukan karena hati yang tak lagi merasa
tapi karena memang semuanya sudah saatnya

seperti induk burung yang akhirnya akan melepas anaknya terbang tinggi, pergi jauh
busur panah yang akhirnya akan dibiarkan melesat...
mencari takdirnya sendiri...
mereka saling melepaskan bukan karena sudah tidak ada yang tersisa
hanya semuanya sudah ada waktunya

Movie Time

One of a heartbreaking movie i watch.  A love story about Emma Morley and Dexter Mayhew.  They are friends, start meet when they'r at school, then always meeting at 15th July for twenty years.  Emma Morley, is not-too-attractive girl, smart but not to success after her graduation and start a simple life with working.  Then Dexter, whose a reckless, flirtilicious and attractive man enjoy his life as a tv presenter.  They are always keep in touch, talk and spend a day like a good friend, sharing about their dreams and problems.  I think this is romantic when Emma, realize that she had a crush on Dexter and every second at her life is enlighten by Dexter.  But she know, that Dexter is not really into her, so she try to be a best friend for Dexter.  After twenty years passed, she still can't move on and totally can't erase Dexter on her mind.

Finally, after a dissapointed realtionship, a failed marriage of Dexter and Sylvia.  They finally found their way.

Then they are married, and try to have a baby and still fail.  And at an afternoon Dexter and Emma make an appointment to a coffee shop and on the way Emam got an accident and dies.  Dexter's life be more sad and depressed after her dies.  Then he haunt by Emma's presence since twenty years ago in his life.  An advice from his dad is just keep living, pretend that Emma still life around him, just like his father pretend that his wife, who died because of cancer ten years ago and keep living, then Dexter start to cry.  And the movie just show the moment Dexter can remember with Emma, a nice afternoon at the beautiful backyard.

[last lines]

Dexter: Look, I've gotta go.

Emma: I know.

Dexter: But we will see each other again.

Emma: I know we will.

[smiling she turns to walk away]

Emma: Goodbye, Dex.

Dexter: Goodbye.

Emma: Goodbye.

[he watches her as she walks away and then turns to walk the opposite way]

...

This is the heart-breaking movie.  Sad, because of Emma just lit up with Dexter and still can't move on from her feeling for twenty years, really need a good luck to finally have a way to come back, and find that Dexter feel the same way.  Touched.  And Sad.  The moral of the story is, never let people you love go.  Because, you just dont know how far fate will bring you go.  A mysterious way of being separated.  You will never know.  Being grateful for what you have now.  Not ignoring each other, and life best for all the moment you have...

xoxo

joke ?

This picture is a twitter's trending topic on Saturday, February 18th 2012 and makes me laugh.  It is a sarcasm, i think to making a joke for our president.  A quite disrespect to our leader.  But his performance its not quite as well.  From the critical journalist, news and debate on tv they describe him as a leader who mostly care about his image.  For politics, its good to make some good image.  But now, after he elected to a president, he cant be a total politican. He must realize now he must make a choice for his people, not his party.  The major point people elect him i think because he is ex-military so people have a faith he can be more clear to his vision.  And with his political brand , "Say No to Corruption" is not really happening.  Start from case and case that may point to him and his party.  Especially the happening case now, with his party, demokrat or democracy that involve Nazaruddin and Angelina Sondakh that guessed just tell lie and lie to the court as a suspect of corruption.  The 'big' corruption because invoked a lot of money that may impossible to work alone, impossible to enjoy it alone, and not related to them and their party's connection.  Maybe KPK still can't make them stay at jail.  But people start to lose their trust, when our president give a speech at local television, then announce not about the critical issues to our country, but announce about how good he are.  Without any clear action to prove.

Maybe it is just my absurd opinion after i start my duty to nightwatch at my dormitory.  But for me, he still not my best role model if there is someone asking me about my favourite leader.

and, i just wonder, isn't this picture rude or may people who make it (or published it) would have any trouble ?

xoxo

2week after

Finally exam for 5th semester is over, start from anthropology and ecology for governments, public service management, statistics, regional potency and analysis, public policy, development planning, city and village development interaction.
Then I have training exam, land reform, English, staff analysis and meeting of development planning.
And the exhausted part is samapta. Samapta is physical exam and the standart is raising all years. For this year, my minimum standart is to run about 1777 metres, or around that, sit up 40times, push up 32 times and channing 38 times. I can pass the standart even cant be the best.

This monday 6th semester would start. And i feel curious about the lecture. I hope at this semester the lecture could bring more energy than a sleepy head in the class. But anything the problem is, i must keep fighting to keep my dream alive. Because this is my path, this is my job and my way for now. I must be more ambisionist and more obsess with it so i can raise my knowledge. I hope i will be more productive and good at this government things.

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