Quiet Space

Recently i just realizing that many things has change again.  The different feeling when you face to that problem again and again.  Capability to understand, capability to accept.  Even i can't remember how i can get into this situation.  But it is just relaxing.  Back to my self who dont care about attachment and any other pain.  Just life sincerely with no remorse.  Do what i want to do, being free and tell exactly whats on my mind without any fear to being rejected or hurted.  Then this silence contemplation just hit me.  Could it be better than before or just can ruin my life again? I don't know.  I think people is suppose to have no idea and no clue too in their life.  This is life, when you can't guess what will be happen to you.  Its not in perpetuity good, not in perpetuity bad either.  Maybe the good could lead us to the bad fate, or the bad could bring us to the good things to.  I dont have absolute idea about this.  So, when you get nothing to lose because you are already lose too in your life, why so anxious? You used to getting through something hard before, why dont you take a shoot to get a better chance if the losing is not getting something that you dont have already.  Basically, i dont want to regret anymore. If i'm in rush or looks like i want to make it quick, it is just because i dont want to miss a moment to come.  I really dont know what to think now.