the unlocked character

saturday, 6 july 2024

would tell everyone we meet at elementary school but it just a quick, blurry moments, just remembering your face, seems very familiar dozen years later. heard about you on the next circle of the friend of a friend. already heard about your problems later.

and then on a random day, while i'm meeting with someone. i just see you in front of me. you just sit there, at diantara coffee, looking right in front of me. and we just look at each other. on a not really short moment while im on a day break from office while waiting my current bf before, and you seems wait for your friends too. 

it feels like, a signal from the universe that we are destined to meet each other again after the short memories on the elementary school. the invisible string theory that makes your characters unlocked before this. maybe universe push us to have another extraordinary journey before we are ready to meet each other. 

before this, i felt like the past relationship just uncompatible, the anxiety to have several 'almost' serious boyfriend whos younger for the almost ten years. it just feels not really right for me, to be the older one on a relationship. and then the dynamics, the gap, the lifestyle, the little habits. 

when all of the equations just makes sense when you meet someone who have a smiliar life * i think. besides your past, that adding your extra values from my experience. i always have that itch and worriedness about how i start a family, having a child, how i can be finally the one who taking care of my own family. but you, on the opposite, kinda have a faith on that and already desired to having that. it feels like your positions, your perspectives, completed the idea of my well being. 

you may not a perfect person, kinda annoying and cold, sometimes. but i kinda have that senses its not all you. you just a complete set of a dark storm and bright day combined. so i'll take what i can get on every season. i dont know where this is going, even you seems sure, but also in doubt too, like me. but i try to have no high expectation, just cherish every moments, and keep learning, keep knowing, keep making efforts to know each other for this past few months. wherever we are going, i just feel glad. meeting you and get to unlocking your characters on this thirty two levels. 

119/366