Sometimes in the middle of the night i still wonder what if we still can be together. What if at that time i could fight more for us, and change things. If i do things differently, can't we bring our dream to reality? Our love is the most amazing things that last in my mind. Because i still dont want to left my comfort zone and experience a new acceptance for a new person. From the logic's side i will find someone new but now i still cant find someone who fits with me like you, will i change my mind if it is you?
But then a clear conscience just hit me, i dont need you to be happy by myself. Where are we now? you are happy with your life, and i know i am happy too. So we can live our life apart and still can be happy. Then what else we want?
Everything i do will lead to the path itself. No one will know. Change is inevitable. So stop blaming yourself for whatever happen, for sometimes crossing our path together and feel awkward, or even kinda feel like what it was. People changes, things changes, feeling changes.
Now it depend on us how we look this; as a gift or as a disaster. For me, it is no gift or disaster. Its just what it is. I can feel it right now because it was happen and its not where i am now. I'm left from the past, now i must deal with the after-effect. For all the great things, there is consequences left. No one says it will be bad, or will be better. But at least, we know what we dont want to experience again. Or maybe, its all worth enough to do it once again.
4 August 2014.