Recently, because almost zero activity in the weekend i sleep well at the day and awake at the middle of the night. It makes me wondering and overthink. About anything that happened at the past. Bad effect that haunts me a guilty, loss and sorrow feeling, its just horrible. But i know, yesterday is already gone, nothing i can do to change it, because i just have a chance to live the life today.
Being very blessed to have a religion, have something to hold on when i think i drawn. Besides Qur'an, the most powerful book i ever read is La Tahzan. 567 pages, sometimes when i feel sad and down, i just open it random and always be more positive and inspire.
For some reason, i'm not a very religious person. Especially for the 'cover', but i think i have a very big respect and interest with some religious view. For me, religion have it own purpose to make things right, to makes me keep insane, to be a reason someone to be strong, to feel motivated, loved, inspire. Religion is the answer of your negativity, a total defencelessness to the bigger power that can wipe your worry, sorrow, guilty and whatsoever that makes your life messed, religion is the saviour.
I dont have very much belief, because some aspect just not fit into my mind, so i live my life with integrate what i get with what i feel, i'm not a total believer but i'm an open minded person that have my own filtering-system to make it right for me. I think thats the point to mix life with religion, to make it with purpose, to know the purpose so we can 'make' it right, to not be blinded, but open the eyes and feel it in your heart.
So, i think i will finally sleep well tonight.