Saturday, December 22, 2012

Mother. For me.

This is mother’s day.

Okay.  Because now I’m in a holiday and I have time to write this blog.  And today is a mother’s day so I will share some thoughts about my mothers today.

For me, my memories about mother is … hmm… I cant describe it in one word.  I think it’s quite complicated. LOL.

My relationship with my mother is not like the other *sigh*. Its not means we are not love each other.  I know and I really feel her love, and I love her too, I don’t want to see her hurt.  But we don’t really show our love with exact expression, nor a words, nor a hugs.  

When I was young.  My mother always teach me hard, with diciplines and more yells.  And in my memories I always oppositing her when I was child.  We don’t show much affection.

Now at my 21 ages, we are not talk so much like other mother-daughter.  I don’t talk about my feelings, I don’t beef about my days.  But we do talk in different ways. We talk to share, we talk to have solution, we talk to give motivation to each other.  I will never show my weakness to her and so do her.  We always talk to each other like we have not a problem.  And from that, we become stronger.

Our relationship is tough, she never spoil me, but she never refuse me.  She always listen, even I must have many reason to make her sure about me.  I must try harder to impress her.  She never hugs me, but she always supply what I need.  She never kiss me in forehead but she always prepare and support my dreams.  She never cry with me but she always try to find solution with me.  And I can’t asking more.

In this mother days, we are not even talking about it because we are not mellow people (?) and it will be funny if we talk about it. LOL. Our family’s atmosphere is more like ‘what we do to make it have sense than celebrate the nonsense, how we really make means to each other than show our affections.

So in this mothers day, I will take a trip with her and my little sister.  I hope at this trip we are not arguing to much because we always push each other *sigh*.

I may try, sometimes, but we are different.  We have different things yet we thinks differently but it doesn’t means we hurt each other.  Because all we want is the best for each other. 

Mom, maybe i cant say this right to you but i'm sorry if i always dissapointed you.  I'm sorry if we are arguing.  I'm sorry if we'll be hard to each other.  I'm sorry.  Because sometimes i am not like what you want.  And i can't accede all you want me to.  I'm sorry to not do what you tell me to do.  I'm sorry to not do what you want.  I'm sorry to not be with your side even you are always in my side. i'm really sorry.

We never give gift to each other suprisingly, if I want, then I ask, or they’ll ask what I need. So one day I ever give present to my dad and he said, why you give us something from our money then laughing, he said he don’t want a gift just want me to be the better child *sigh*.  So I think in this mother’s day I will give her my love that I show in my effort to be better person, to be success like what she wants.  I hope i will be her successful wish.

happy mother's day !

" Training is needed in order to love properly; and to be able to give happiness and joy, you must practice DEEP LOOKING directed toward the other person you love. Because if you do not understand this person, you cannot love properly. Understanding is the essence of love. 

If you cannot understand, you cannot love."


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