Some surprising (i know this thing will come, but, still) advise from my dad is come, to be out of job. He says that may i just being jobless for a year than after that i could propose and try any opportunity that i can take. Of course its a shock for me, but he says that it would be nice if i had a deadlock, or doing nothing for a year until i get into a job. I know this is his 'philosopy' mind again telling me and i thinks its quite right (if finally i get a job and then just can have a holiday a few months in a year). I will take that, if my month's expense could handle, but in this economic depression (my dad still waiting his transfer, and my mom, um, like that) i think its not a choice. Of course i have some dream to catch and passion to work than just be a lazy person doing this 'internet-thingy' and watching so many serials and movies, then drawn in my own feelings. I need to be busy, i need to be needed, to explore who am i, what i will do in the next day or have something to catch. If i can choose where i want know, i choose to die trying than die boring. Of course. I hope i can enjoy my self then be an independent woman, free soul that can go wherever i want. This early deadlock makes me realize one thing: i dont want to end up nothing. I want to come up with something. This deadlock must find another way!